Balance

Isn't this a funny word? In one respect it can mean that something is in equilibrium and in another respect is can can be easily thrown out of whack.  It doesn't feel solid to me; a tipping of scales in essence puts one out of balance. And then there is the holy grail...trying to find balance.

I feel like I am always trying to find balance. In my mind this is a threefold goal of having enough employment to keep, if not grandiose, then sufficient amount of money coming in. Balance means having enough time to spend with my little guy. The third thing is finding the time an energy for my own pursuits.

In terms of employment, I guess I would like to call this occupation. Occupation for me is the time I fill doing things that have an economic value. So this can mean work but it can also mean gardening, putting food by, darning a pair of socks, bartering with a friend. It fills my time. I would like that time if it is going to be filled to have a sense of satisfaction after the work is done. There is no greater feeling for me than standing in my cold room and taking stock of what I put by for the season. For me it means that I can save money at the grocery store, weather a financial storm with a little resilience and if I do not have to get in a car on a cold day in January to make dinner ...so much better!

With my little guy in school for the first time this year I find that the time I spend with him is even more important for me. School sure does eat up a lot of time. But we are finding ways to keep it real. We read at the bus stop. We enjoy mom and little guy dates. Most importantly, we enjoy quiet days at home where he can just play. We make the most of snow days..thank goodness we've had a few those this year.

Finally, time for my own pursuits. I think it may be a challenge for me to always give this part  of the scale the due it deserves. My big problem is, I think, is that I have too many varied interests. I have taken up running again. I enjoy this but for the health benefits and stress relief it provides. I read A LOT, but sometimes this is for work; so my brain wanders into this realm sometimes. I am not hand knitting as much as I used to.  I find that I just don't sit down for the long stretches like when I was knitting more. Still I put a few rows on something when I get the chance. Writing is always an important activity for me and I want to write more but I haven't figured out a way to do this without giving up much needed sleep. Work requires some writing and I feel like even when I am not able to write my stuff I am still flexing that muscle. The writing muscle is not getting flabby; it is just cross-training.

Sometimes I think that when we are in the pursuit of a goal it can be hard to know when we've reached it.  There are only 24 hours in a day but the great thing is there is always another one tomorrow1